Wednesday, December 5, 2007

When life gives you lemons...


Today was insane. It is a typical day a few days before a major sculptural installation, but add to the fact that I am supposed to be at Fall Fest this weekend, and I wasn't sure if I was supposed to start at Bridger this weekend, and I haven't started fabricating the sculpture yet because the materials are being (graciously) donated...

Yeah. Oh, and my mouth hurts and I can't open my jaw more than an inch without stabbing pain in the hinge, and I have a squishy flappy blood blister, and I ate a bowl of chocolate chips last night... what else... oh, I am still having trouble letting go the hurt and anger I feel about the Blog Censorship issue...

So when I RACED home tonight, after getting 18 of the 26 things on my list done... I got my uniform out of the dryer, taped up my foot, grabbed my water bottle, and Tom comes in all doubled over in pain. He'd fallen on the ice AGAIN and tweaked the hell out of his back.

Here's the worst part: I was mad at Tom for hurting himself. Because I am supposed to be in training here, and taking it seriously, and I can't have Tom hurting himself because I need to go for ONE HOUR and train.

Lets get some perspective, please.

He's in bed with Bodhi now, who has been crying since 7:30 for a reason that we can't figure out. Just one of those tantrumy nights. And my wood isn't prepped for tomorrow, and I haven't signed up for Fall Fest, and my babysitter flaked on me for tomorrow...

And these are things that happen in life. And sometimes, I really let them get a hold of me. And I want to feel sorry for myself. And I want other people to know how hard this is. And how disappointed I am, or gyped I feel. And then I think about the fact that I have it pretty good. Tom works hard to take care of the kids, we do this as a team. I can't lay in bed with a crying kid for three hours, but he can, and does. He's got his own stress and life going on. And now his back hurts.

I am sure it will all get done, it always does, one way or another. And the kids won't be insane tomorrow, and Tom's back will feel better tomorrow, and I'll get a lot done tomorrow. So tonight, I am going to let it go, and chalk today up to one of the ones I miss. And know that I can go tomorrow, or next week. I'll get back on track, and so will Bodhi.

Deep breath, start again tomorrow.


***UPDATE***

So, instead of feeling sorry for myself, i will make some tea and read Perez Hilton for a while, and then do something that needs doing, like work on my schedule. I already feel better.

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